Who said arrogance? Not me. Arrogance is a character trait; what I mean by breathtaking sense of entitlement is the idea that it’s somehow quite normal behaviour to take your own wine to restaurants.
Within this wine community that may seem so but my point is that in the wider world, it’s absolutely not. In terms of normative behaviour it’s we that are the outliers and not the restaurants.
Taken in that context that’s why so many places are as Richard W describes:
It always stuns me though how many places are inherently suspicious and immediately dismissive of it - as though you are somehow conning them.
This is not an answer to the OP, rather a view about how we on here react to this old Chestnut.
Of course we on this forum are the outliers, just that often we huff and puff at accepting it.
It really is not normal
behaviour to turn up at any venue where a transaction model is occurring and have about your person something that is normally
the role of the other party to provide.
However once we accept if we can, that it is we who are being a bit different it is often possible to strike a balance by say buying off list and augmenting those choices with something special to us that the restaurant may not be able to offer. (there can be anyone of a million reasons around this).
It is gracious of an establishment to agree, but their prerogative to decline.
Wine centric bookings or events are a different kettle of fish and many on here have excellent mutually beneficial arrangements and understandings with places they support regularly and who accommodate our brand of oddity.
But to make a normal
reservation at a regular
restaurant and expect corkage as some sort of a right we should not be surprised if the restaurants default position is suspicion that we are indeed trying to con them.
When looking for a corkage arrangement I think things start best if we accept that it is slightly odd behaviour.